Many years ago, the morning I said good-bye to my first husband, alone in my quiet house, I resolved I would no longer choke back my own voice. I made up my mind to become a different person. I didn’t know how to go about doing that, but I knew that before I could transform myself into something new, I needed to wake up all the way. 

Recently, I went on a ten-day silent retreat. When I say “silent” I mean exactly that—silence during the day, silence during meals, silence in the halls, silence when walking outside. No conferences were held in which to ask questions or give comments. We were requested not to read anything, the only exception being Scripture. If the going got tough—if, because of the silence, we became bombarded with negative thoughts or memories—we were allowed to speak only to one of the two people leading the retreat.